Dontrelle Willis’ second stint on the 15-day DL this season for an anxiety disorder has raised many eyebrows, and not just because this was yet another ballplayer being conveniently stashed away on the DL for some intangible “injury” (Khalil Greene, Joey Votto).  And it’s just not because of the way D-Train’s anxiety disorder was discovered (by a blood test, which the medical profession equates with discovering your favorite Jonas Brother through a stool sample).  No – it’s because some in the industry believe they know the cause of his anxiety. They feel Willis’ long-secret romantic affair with Billy the Marlin is about to go public.
 
“The only thing a blood test is gonna show anybody is what STD that sonofabitch Billy the Marlin gave that poor kid,” said former Marlins manager Jack McKeon, who lead the 2003 Marlins on their improbable championship run. “Their affair epitomized the ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ culture baseball used to be about, damnit, until that Robinson clown showed up in ’47.  Now what? We have a former phenom crying to his shrink because he can’t sleep in the bed he made.”
 
Billy the Marlin debuted before the start of the Marlins’ inaugural 1993 season and quickly became a fan favorite at Pro Player/Dolphins/Land Shark Stadium. Literally. Billy became one fan’s favorite mascot. Years before the launch of a “Billy’s Bunch” kids club for fans aged 12 and under, there was “Billy’s Bonch,” a secretive players-only clubhouse society that only admitted members via word of ass-to-mouth. Willis became the club’s youngest inductee when he was called up in 2003 from the AA-class Carolina Mudcats mid-season to shore up the Marlins’ rotation and quickly became one of Billy’s favorite members.
 
Willis famously made an immediate splash in 2003, eventually winning the Rookie of the Year award after posting a 14-6 record with a 3.30 ERA. D-Train, however, wasn’t a stranger to the costumed kind. While playing in AA, Willis was often seen spending his off days with Mudcat mascot Muddy, sometimes going to see a movie together. They even once jointly celebrated their birthdays in Raleigh hot spot Capital Corral. Muddy declined to be interviewed for this story.
 
A teammate with the Mudcats, Marlins, and currently the Tigers, first baseman Miguel Cabrera said other teammates at the time didn’t think much was unsual about their friendship, and that “at worst, he was maybe just being a little fuzz-curious.” Cabrera believes, however, that Willis’ quick rise may have turned Billy on to recruiting the young black star more aggressively. “Jeffy (Conine) was the clubhouse cop back then and sort of acted as gatekeeper to the club, but you can say he played a big part in getting Dontrelle face time with Billy’s Bonch.”
 
Billy’s Bonch gained the same notoriety within big league clubhouses that Hugh Heffner and Playboy enjoyed in the adult entertainment industry, and just as Heff was known to do from time to time, Billy designated Willis his personal favorite. Willis lead the majors with 19 hit batsmen in 2006, and insiders believe that most of those, if not all, were messages for Billy. The relationship was headed in a bad direction throughout 2007, and during the following off-season, Willis was traded to Detroit after demanding a change of scenery from the front office. The media believed it was a cost-cutting move that would save the organization millions in salaray arbitration, but the reality is that Willis and Billy simply became too much of a distraction.
 
Fast forward to 2009, and a reeling newspaper industry clamoring for more exclusive material to stave off bankruptcy began to shed light on Willis’ years with the Marlins. The “Baseball” page of the Miami Herald’s website tallied a record 11 hits the day they reported Willis’ trade may have been done at his request, almost outpacing the “Reader Pet of the Day” feature. Not coincidentally, D-Train’s comeback from an injury-marred 2008 has been derailed so far. His mechanical issues and lack of command are jeapordizing the second year of a $27 million, three-year contract extension.

Noted sports Psychologist Mick D. Mack, MD, believes Willis must face his angry dragon head on and conquer it. “Guys like A-Rod took a weight off their shoulders when they went public with their past transgressions. Other guys admitted that they were injected with foreign substance, and Dontrolle must also, even if it’s hard for him to swallow.”

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