Onthefence about Murph?

Why would you be onthefence about Murph? What’s keeping you ontheedge of not liking Murph the way we do?

Is it his errors in the field that make you feel onthebrink of happiness that your smug opinion of Murph should be the reason that he should be relegated to the bench? Well, Murph has made 7 errors and that ties him for 42nd in the major leagues for most errors with a bunch of others. “That can’t be” you think, “Murph makes an error every inning”. Through 623 innings, Murphy has a .984 fielding percentage. “Who could have more errors than Murph?” That’s a long list. Here’s a few notables: Justin Upton, Justin Turner, Brad Inge, Dan Uggla, Miguel Tejada, Albert Puljous, Prince Fielder, Jose Reyes, Chone Figgans, Adrian Beltre, Ricky Weeks, and Hanley Ramirez. The bulk of those guys get to play 1 position most of the time while Murph has played at least 4 different positions so far.

Still ontheverge of cringing every time Murph walks into view on your dusty HD screen? It can’t be his hitting can it? You will grudgingly concede “yeah, Murph’s an alright hitter” but really, just how good has he been?

Murph currently is hitting .306, which has him in a tie for 10th place in the NL. You say “I know that, but the true measure of a hitter is how clutch is he?”

Let’s take a look at hitting with 2 outs and runners on, the most common of clutch situations. In the major leagues among players with 65 or more such at bats you have Adrian Gonzalez at .406, Kevin Youkilis at .352, Miguel Cabrera at .329, and Daniel Murphy at .324. One other player, Young of Texas at .307, is over .300 with that many at bats in that situation. So the only player in the NL hitting over .300 with 2 outs and runners on with 65 or more at bats is Daniel Murphy.

So it’s your decision just like the umpire that’s behind home plate. We think this decision has the ball onthewhite, a clear definite call of a strike for Murphy to continue to be a regular on this club. If you think the ball is on the black and not sure its a strike, well, maybe you need your eyes examined.

Everyone has been talking about Murph and the hot bat he’s been swinging but all the praise has led to a bit of confusion.  Murph felt he needed to clear a few things up and that’s why he faxed a statement to us over here at OhMurphDotCom as he knows this is the place people come for “all things Murph” and it read as follow:

“I’ve been hearing lots from the media and beat writers recently and I couldn’t let this go on any further.  I don’t want to hear anymore about me going “the other way”.  It’s simply not true, I’m interested in women and women only.  Ask the guys, they’ll tell you.  On the flights I read Maxim.  When people suggest dinner options Hooters is always on top of my list.  Also please stop asking me if I’m excited about our upcoming series in San Francisco.  I look forward to all our games equally.  Thank you for your time, now I must return to the normal activities a guy who likes only chicks does.”

Ironically, in true Oh Murph style when he came up to the plate in the 7^th  inning of yesterday’s game Murph, perhaps sending a message pulled it.

The past few days in Atlanta have been for the most part enjoyable for the Mets.  No Met was having a better time than Justin Turner who used his locally popular surname to get VIP treatment beyond the standard 5 stars a professional athlete is used to. 

Turner started the shenanigans shortly after checking in when he went down to the front desk of the team hotel and told the manager he didn’t think “Uncle Ted” would be very pleased with his accommodations at all, he was quickly upgraded to the penthouse suite.

After game one of the series, Turner went to popular Atlanta watering hole “Wet Willies” where he skipped out on a $1500 tab.  The next night he was seen at gentleman’s club “Magic City” convincing dancers if they left with him he could get them jobs at TBS.

The epitome of Turner’s identity theft came when he overslept before the last game and had to catch a cab to the stadium in the middle of rush hour traffic.  “Step on it!” Turner snapped at his driver.  “That stadium you’re driving to, it was named after me.”

Sunday afternoon I was very certain we had another patented “Oh Murph” moment on our hands when it appeared Murph was called out for leaving too early on a tag up play. I was delighted when I heard Murph had indeed left on time but what happened to him after the game is just too much for a sensitive guy like Murph to handle.

Fresh off the debacle on the bases Murph was just happy to put the afternoon behind him. He was minding his own business listening to Terry when all of a sudden a clubhouse attendant burst in and exclaimed that someone had left the postgame powwow early and hit the buffet while the rest of the team was still getting debriefed. All eyes turned to Murph as he had some crumbs on his face but it wasn’t from the pilfered food, it was actually from a pb&j sandwich his Mom makes him before each game. Not wanting to explain any of those details, Murph blurted out:

“It was me. I left early”

With that sentiment echoing throughout the visiting clubhouse at PNC Park, no one paid any mind while Angel Pagan hoarded three loaves of bread, a pound of coleslaw and a bottle of Cholula sauce (the one with the wooden cap) into his carryon luggage.

So the Mets took 2 of 3 from ATL over the weekend but that’s not the big story.  The real news came out of the visiting clubhouse when we uncovered the real truth about how Roger McDowell is coping after his bigotry fueled suspension.  It’s OhMurphDotCom and you know how we do it.  The story behind the story.

His few weeks away from the team was only part of Roger’s suspension.  It turns out that the Mothers Day edition pink bats were put aside for Roger’s return and he is required to use it during batting practice when hitting fungos.   He also must wear the pink spikes/sweatband combo for the duration of the season.  When he’s not on the field McDowell must make sure all the beverages in the clubhouse are on coasters.  Lastly Roger is in charge of keeping the bathrooms smelling fresh at all times by constantly replenishing a supply of potpourri.  Apparently he is a huge fan of any scent that is lilac dominant.

Although we can’t confirm this, rumors are swirling that McDowell will be presenting members of the SF Giants  with his special potpourri blend when they come to Atlanta in August as a gesture of good will.

Immediately following the “Don’t trade Jose Reyes” rally at the Shea Bridge, the “Don’t trade Scott Hairston” rally began.

Despite the appearance of Cowbell Man, the event was lightly attended.

Inspired by his graceful play in the field during the Mets win last night in the
rain over the Nats, the producer of Riverdance has contacted the Mets and made
arrangements for Daniel Murphy to join the cast of the traveling company.

“We’ve been watching Murphy for some time now” said Sean Fitzpatrick, Riverdance associate choreographer. “He’s actually practiced with the company on several occasions over the past few winters. While his jig still needs some work, his reel would make me dearly departed sainted mother weep like the mist of the old sod. He also needs to learn to keep his head up, can’t always be starin’ at yer feet now.”

Terry Collins was in favor of the action stating “It’ll be good for Murph, keep him sharp. I expect his playing time will drop off a little once Davis and Wright get back now that Turner’s rippin’ the cover off it.”

A month after the initial injury, the Hospital for special surgery has finally resorted to sophisticated imagining techniques to determine that David Wright is suffering from a stress fracture in his lower back.

Our very own Young Daniel Murphy was gunned down at the plate last night against the Rockies while apparently texting on his iPhone4 replete with black Otter case.

Murphy was caught sending a condolence text to Chris Young after learning of his season ending surgery.