Posts Tagged ‘ryan church’

The New York Mets’ injury woes continued today when mascot Mr. Met, 47, was diagnosed with a concussion by a neurologist not affiliated with the team. The injury apparently occurred sometime during the last homestand when Pepsi Party Patrol member Herb, accidentally launched a giveaway t-shirt into Mr. Met’s head.

Mr. Met is believed to have lost conciousness at the time of the injury and showed symptoms of a concussion when he began vomiting and complaining of headaches. Team doctors dismissed this as food poisoning and treated him with two extra-large Tylenol. Mr. Met had been performing with the concussion through this past Sunday’s game at CitiField. Former Met outfield Ryan Church reached out to Mr. Met and told him to get examined by a neurologist.

The unnamed neurologist’s report “suspects the world’s largest concussion” but cannot be 100% sure as the search for an MRI machine large enough to contain Mr. Met’s giant dome has been unsuccessful. Team doctors scoffed at the report and manager Jerry Manuel went as far to say “Mr. Met is a different animal than Ryan Church.” Omar Minaya blamed Daily News reporters for the injury, and somewhere, Tony Bernazard ripped his shirt off and challenged a minor-league mascot to a fight.

The team has not announced how they will replace Mr. Met on the next homestand, if he is unable to perform. There are some reports that indicate that the infrequently seen Mrs. Met may take her husband’s place or that Buster T. Bison may be recalled from Triple-A Buffalo; but conflicting reports say that Bobby Bonilla may return to the organization in a Mr. Met-type costume.

When asked about the Bonilla rumor, COO Jeff Wilpon would not confirm nor deny, instead indicating that the team would “rather not” have to pay any additional money to Bonilla; who is owed $1.2M annually from 2011 to 2035 as part of his January 2000 contract buyout.

The Oh Murph crew got first sight at an open letter to Mets fans from Ryan Church which is to hit NY papers tomorrow morning.

Lucky for you, were going to let you take a peak…. right now!

Dear Mets Fans,

I first would like to thank the editors of Oh Murph for agreeing to publish this letter. While other news organization were lazy in their reporting of my skipping third base in Los Angeles in the name of Teen Abstinence, Oh Murph was brave enough to report the truth about my meaningful protest back in late May.

To the fans of New York, I’d first like to congratulate them on acquiring Jeff Francoeur. He’s a heck of a player and despite having already compiled seven strikeouts en route from Atlanta to JFK, he should provide much needed pop from the right side of the plate. And while I look forward to a new beginning in Atlanta, I look back fondly at my 18 months in New York. When Brian Schneider and I arrived here from Washington for Lastings Milledge, I know many of you were skeptical. It takes a lot of foresight to trade one of the organization’s most talented and exciting prospects for a part-time catcher and a 29-year-old corner outfielder who never amassed more than 70 rbi in a season and who once made disparaging remarks about Jewish people – and bringing him to New York. It goes to show what a savvy general manager you Mets fans are blessed with. Not many GM’s out there can boast two silver medals in both divisional AND wild card races in the same season two years running (not too shabby!)

And while I must admit, I am as disappointed as you are that I could not produce somewhat better numbers, we did have some great times together didn’t we? I mean, who could forget the two doubles I had against the Cubs in June of last year? Or my gutty 1-4 versus the Marlins earlier this season. And I’m sure I must have thrown a few guys out at 2nd or 3rd or whatever. Who knows, maybe a few years from now I’ll join the ranks of Richard Hidalgo, Bruce Chen, and Brian McRae in the exclusive “Oh yeah, I forgot about that guy” club. Maybe I’ll even become the most memorable of the easily forgettable.

I also learned a lot from my brief stay in New York. I was exposed to fine art, brown mustard, and tolerance. The latter I owe to Rabbi Schmule Ben-Zobrist of the 5th Avenue Synagogue. A life long Mets fan, Schmule taught me to question some of my long-held beliefs. Still, Rabbi, I’d pack shorts and sunscreen to my funeral I were you just in case, as I hear eternal damnation can get pretty toasty.

Well, what more can I say? I look forward to coming back to Citi Field in September and parking two Livan breaking balls into the Pepsi Porch to dash any last hope of a wild card birth.

Yours,

Ryan Church

Also, for your viewing pleasure…. A video tribute to Ryan Church

Church from OHMURPH on Vimeo.

Seems that there are mixed reactions to the Church – Francoeur trade.  I personally like it.  Francoeur is 5 years younger and I

think change will do him good, plus his name is kind of cool.  I really liked church and I will miss him.  He wasn’t treated well here so hopefully it will be better for him as well.

Oh yeah… Church just picked up a game in the standings.

For more thoughts on today’s trade:

Mark Bradley from AJC in Atlanta writes that the Braves ran out of patience:  The Francoeur Trade:  A sad but necessary ending.

Espn.com quotes Francoeur being surprised by being traded to a rival, while Church was completely shocked.  Church immediately texted Chipper Jones and states he knows all the mets signs, and he’ll fill the Braves in (bastard!)

Mike Puma from the NY Post now knows that life still exists in the Mets front office.

Gondeee over at Talking Chop in Atlanta likes the deal and breaks down both of their seasons.

Lastly, Braves fan “20+ Year Season Ticket Holder” leaves this note on the ACJ comment section.  This post sounds eerily similar to what Mets fans have been saying for the past two months.  Click here to see over 300 comments from Braves fans regarding the trade.

After 20+ years as a season ticket crazy, I love the Braves, Bobbie and Ted. Thank you.

As for John S., you were the master over time with Bobbie and your talent. Amazing TALENT.

This trade STINKS.
I don’t care if Jeff ever hits a single again.
You, of all people, have demonstrated there is no loyalty.
A Braves hallmark.
I’m done.
Chipper, run now.
John S., you look brighter every day.
And Doggie’s “number retirement” is on the 17th.
Will be a requiem.
Mark Bradley has no idea folks, none, nada, squat…
great writer though.
I love the Braves.
The Braves don’t “want” us.
Nor does the AJC and Mark.
Can’t believe I’m posting for this first time.
Go Braves.

Would anyone like my seats for the rest of the season.
Jeff, never met you.
Do well.
Braves.
Remember this.
GO BRAVES!!!

Los Angeles – In a 2-2 ballgame in the top of the 11th inning Monday night, Ryan Church was greeted with a high five by Louis Castillo after crossing home plate with the go-ahead run. Only the run didn’t count. On his dash from first base, after an Angel Pagan drive to the right-centerfield gap, Church missed the third base bag, resulting in an out and likely costing the Mets the game. It was the latest and most embarrassing mistake in what has been a season filled with miscues for the team.

Fielding reporters’ questions after the game, Church was unapologetic for his base running blunder, claiming it was no blunder at all. Rather, it was a stand for teen abstinence.

Church, whose deep religious views are well known, told reporters, “Young people in America are constantly bombarded with graphic images of sex everywhere they turn. And it’s difficult to remain committed to God’s intentions.  Spending time on 1st base is fairly innocent.  And even swiping 2nd base can be fairly sinless.  But trouble starts at 3rd, where it is often difficult for teens to obey the yield sign on their way to ‘home plate.’  Hopefully this gesture will raise awareness for this very important cause.”

While with the Washington Nationals in 2005, Church issued an apology after relaying a conversation he had with the team’s chaplain.  Seeking advice about a former girlfriend, who was Jewish, Church reportedly asked, “Jewish people, they don’t believe in Jesus.  Does that mean they’re doomed?”  After being told that yes, in fact, they are, Church replied, “Man, if they only knew.  Other religions don’t know any better. It’s up to us to spread the word.”  When pressed whether or not he’d “rounded third” properly with that girlfriend, Church stated he did, but that it “didn’t count because she’s just a Jew broad.”

But what can a teen do to stave off temptation when there seems to be a clear path to home?  Church recommends doing what he does.  ”Just envision the bloated figure of third base coach Razor Shines giving you the stop sign.  And just remember, you don’t need to go all the way to score with Jesus.”

Despite being 4th on the team in at bats through Tuesday, Church is 9th in runs scored